The Lover

Tim VS Tim

Last year I was in a car accident.
Nothing too dramatic, three lanes.
Me on the far right, the man in the far left – and we both merged into the middle lane, and each other.

I had merged into a very creepy 60 year old man named Tim.
I stored Tim’s details in my phone incase I needed to contact him, and he saved mine.

The insurance company declared it a ‘Each Bare Own Responsibility’ accident.
Meaning we each pay to fix our own cars.


3 months later, I had a very casual encounter with a beautiful 28 year old bartender named Tim.

One very hot evening, 28 year old Tim and I had been sexting. He was at work, and I was waiting for him to finish for some sexy time. I had a drink or two, and had taken some rather explicit pictures, and wrote some very suggestive content to send to Tim.

Several minutes later, and there was no response. I looked to his message conversation and the picture hadn’t sent.

I noticed another message conversation named Tim.
Confusion, and then horror.

I immediately switched my phone off and hid it in my underwear draw. I don’t know why. My brain just went “ABORT ABORT”.

About an hour later I switched on my phone, I still needed to contact hot Tim.

Weeks went by and I never recieved a call or text from creepy Tim. I assumed he was too old to have data on his phone and therefore didn’t have the capabilities to download the explicit pictures.


On Friday, some 9 months later- I recieved a phone call from Nicole from GIO. It went something like this.

” Hello ****,

I’m calling to inform you that Mr Tim has put in a complaint through his insurance company and has attached photographic and written content where he claims you are attempting to seduce him in order to get out of paying his excess. He claims that this is evidence to support that you are in fact at fault.”

The entire GIO team had seen my bum cheeks.


My brain (from embarrassment) went into panic/auto pilot mode. I blurted out “No, it was an accident, Tim is the name of my Fiancee. I was sending it to him”. I don’t know why I lied, I think I didn’t want the GIO lady thinking I was promiscuous.

It didn’t end there, I continued. “Believe me, if I was trying to seduce him, he would have been seduced!!!” – my ego was also taking a hit.

Nicole then continued to read out the written content. Where I was offering very specific services (to hot Tim). She was very professional, but I had the feeling that I was on speaker, with her entire team listening. A story they will no doubt be telling their friends for years to come.

At this stage, I was prepared to hand over all my money for this conversation to end.

However, Nicole further explained that this had no impact on the claim, and that she just had to notify me.

I apologized several times, then we hung up. I had my phone in my underwear draw for 2 days!

1 comment on “Tim VS Tim

  1. HAHAHA. OMG this made my day! Sorry to laugh at your expense but it was so good! I can’t believe old Tim thought that and put in an actual complaint. Girl I’m soooo not into taking photos of myself like that in case shit like this happens lol. WAIT – what happened with hot Tim? and how hot is he?

    Liked by 1 person

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