Why Is The Mystery Of Dating Obsolete?

There I stood in a fresh farmers market, my hand reaching down to pick a ruby red delicious apple, when all of a sudden another hand reached to pick the same one. I looked up into big green eyes and a handsome smile. I apologised, gave him the apple and walked a few steps to the left. “Hey, wait, I’m Evan” he said comfortably. He was oh-so charming, and kept trying to talk to me – I was confused, it almost felt a little odd. He asked for my number and that weekend we went on a date.

I didn’t know his last name which meant no social media stalking, and subsequently no anxiety. There was mystery, excitement, and a little bit of a thrill – all of which I hadn’t felt in such a long time. What was happening here?

Ladies and Gentlemen, it’s no shock that since the technological revolution, our lives have been greatly impacted. Technology has brought us closer but pulled us further apart. What I want to explore is the impact that technology has had on our romantic lives, and more specifically, the way we date. What is this new social order? How have we constructed a new framework that dating sits in?

There was an organic change to the framework of dating, but were we notified about this? Did we get a vote? Were we warned about the side effects of convenience?

Tinder – How on earth did something as intimate as chemistry get turned into a mobile phone application? This app is used on a global scale and is available in 40 languages. It boasts an average of 12 million matches per day an users collectively make around 1 billion swipes a day. 50 million people use this app, so there has to be something great about it, right?

In this culture of instant gratification, I can see how there would be an appeal. I can even see that it offers a platform to connect with people that you may not normally be able to connect with – but at what cost? Mystery, excitement, and thrill are exchanged for convenience, information, and instant gratification. Is that something we signed up for?

Don’t you remember that rush? When dating wasn’t a sure thing? When you actually met someone before you knew everything about them? If you don’t – I urge you to try. Romance isn’t something you can force, it happens organically, a spark, chemistry, a slow understanding of each other, and a falling in love.

We complain that romance is dying, but we keep firing the gun – put down the gun and give romance a shot.

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